Marius Helf | The Happy Yeti

How comes that some people don’t seem to be affected by setbacks, while others struggle with annoyances all day, every day?

The trick is: be like a tire. Yes, like those ones under your car. Read on, and it will make sense.

Everyone has setbacks every once in a while. And I’m not even talking about big setbacks that influence the rest of your life, but small ones.

Being stuck in traffic. Your presentation not going as good as you wish. All those little potholes that are not harmful, but can annoy the $3i7 out of you.

// Fact is: everyone has setbacks. //

But it’s about how you deal with them. How you, consciously or subconsciously, choose to perceive them. How you choose to react.

How you overcome them.

How resilient you are.

// Resilience is the ability of a material to absorb energy when it is deformed elastically, and release that energy upon unloading. //

I have first heard about resilience in one of my first projects in my first job. I was working with a tire manufacturer. Our engineers were busy designing the perfect rubber for the perfect tire.

One of the core measures was resilience.

Tires need to be resilient. They carry the weight of the car, they transfer the power of the motor onto the road and propel you forward. And on every trip they hit an uncounted number of potholes, pebbles, dirt, curbs, and other little obstacles on the road.

And what does the tire do when he hits a pothole? He absorbs a good part of the shock, jumps out of the pothole on the other side, and continues as if nothing had happened.

He doesn’t muse about how many potholes he’s already hit, he doesn’t freeze in fear of the potholes to come, and he bears no visible mark from all the bumps that he has already bounced through.

// This is what resilience is. The ability to debounce from all those little obstacles on your road. Continue unaffected and fearless. //

This will free up your energy to progress, to grow and to develop excellence.

// What can you do right now to be more resilient? //

Sleep well and enough. If you are not rested, it will be much harder to bounce.
Exercise. Movement loosens your body, releases stress, makes the body relaxed and helps you sleep better.
Take time to relax. Take time to wind down. Take time for breaks.
Reset your anchor. Zoom out and change your perception. While you’re stuck in traffic, it seems that that is the worst that can happen. But is it really? It also means that you have a car, that you have somewhere to be. And time for another good song on the radio or some extra time with your favorite podcast.
Choose your battles. If you can’t change it, let it be and bounce off. If you can change it, and it’s too bad, change it. Else, accept it and bounce off.
Be fluid. Be smart. Do you have to do whatever you are doing? Do you have to do it now, or is there another place, or another time, where you can achieve the same thing with fewer obstacles?
Learn techniques to actively reduce the feeling of stress and frustration. Breathwork, meditation and mindfulness are a good starting point.

What else is missing? How do you debounce from those big and small setbacks?

Much love,
Marius

Inspiration

Feeling tired in the morning?

by Marius Helf

So do I. Often, when the alarm rings in the morning, all I want to do is to turn around and sleep another hour.

And if you occasionally wake up tired, too, I may have something for you.

Of course, you can work on your sleep hygiene. Your bedtime. The amount of sleep you get regularly. But if your alarm is already buzzing, it’s too late for that. So what can you do to be ready for your kids, your work, your hobbies, but you feel sooo tired?

The answer is as trivial as it is powerful:

// Do something that energizes you! //

It can be anything. Do 10 jumping jacks. Take a shower, maybe a cold one. And knowing my background, here’s the inevitable:

// Breathwork! That’s my go-to morning-energizer. //

Breathwork. That’s my go-to morning-energizer. Even before coffee. Sometimes even before I get up.

If you are following my posts, chances are that you are into the Wim Hof Method.

When have you last done the breathwork? Remember how powerful it can feel?

I try to do it every day, preferably in the morning.

And often I conclude it with one round of power breathing, an modification to the Wim Hof breathing that you learn in the advanced Wim Hof Method workshops.

When the regular WHM breathwork is sugar, then the power breathing is cocaine.

And that’s what I need at the moment. Since two weeks, we have renovations going on, and we live between dust, boxes and mess on what feels like 10 square meters between the bedroom and the kitchen. The rest is under construction, or temporary storage crammed with boxes. Not the ideal environment to feel rested. But I picked up my morning breathwork again.

Take this morning. The alarm went off much too early again, but after just two rounds of power breathing, I literally jumped out of bed, did a dance of joy, jumped in the shower, and I’m full of love and inspiration.

But enough about me. What is it that gets you going in the morning? What’s your little energizer in a long, busy day? And what are your struggles?

Much love,
Marius

Inspiration

And tomorrow I’ll be happy

by Marius Helf

// Tomorrow I’ll be happy //

Tomorrow I’ll have time for my friends.
For my family.

Just finish one more task.
Just finish this one project.
Just get done with the house renovations.

Just bite through the next week.
The next month.
The next year.
Then I’ll have time for my family and for my friends.

So many people fall into this rabbit hole.

// They are results oriented. //

“When I get a result I’ll be happy.”

But when you get the result, what then?
Achieving your goal makes you happy for a day.

And then?
Once you’ve lost 5 kg you gain 5 kg.
Once your house is tidy your house sinks into chaos.

Because the way you do things did not change.
Because the way you think did not change.
Because your process did not change.

Once your project is done… you either stop or you have the next project.

// So how can you be happy every day? //

Just don’t be results oriented.

Don’t work for your results.
Don’t bind your happiness to your goals.

// Become process oriented. //

Create a routine that you enjoy.
Make the time it takes for your results enjoyable.

And take a break once in a while.

Most people achieve 80% of their productivity in like the first 4 hours of the day.

No matter how important that project is.
No matter how urgent things seem to be.
No matter how fast you want it.

// Design a process that you can sustain.//

A way of working that makes you happy every day.

And take a break once in a while. Make it part of your routine. Recharge every day.
And be a turtle.

If your process is good results will follow automatically.

Much love
~Marius

Inspiration

How 10 seconds can make your day a good…

by Marius Helf

Crossroads… life is full of them. 10 seconds to decide: left or right? Onwards or back?

10 seconds to decide…
Burger or salad?
Drive or walk?
facebook or meditation?
Cold shower or hot?

// 10 seconds decide what happens in the next hours //

Every morning, I have 20 minutes where I can do whatever I want. It’s free time. I made sure that the rest of my routine, shower, breakfast, getting ready for work, do not interfere with them.

20 minutes just for me. My time.
I’m sure you also have 20 minutes somewhere.

When you wake up.
Or when you come home from work.
Or after dinner.

What do you do?

In my 20 minutes I want to breathe and meditate.

So I brush my teeth, come down. And the next 10 seconds decide what happens in the next 20 minutes.

Do I pick up my phone and check my latest post? My messages? Oops, 20 minutes gone. Let’s rush over to breakfast. My head is spinning.

Or do I snuggle up in a blanket, close my eyes and breathe? Get my head free? Aaah such bliss! Here I am world, let’s rock!

10 seconds to decide for 20 minutes of waste or 20 minutes of bliss.

20 minutes to prime you for the day. Start it rushing through other peoples shouts and posts? Or start it with a calm mind? Bliss, energy?

20 minutes to decide whether your day starts relaxed or with information overload. Where your headspace is.

Are you present during breakfast? Enjoy every bite? Or is your head still spinning with other people’s content? Do you rush through breakfast, upset your belly?

You see where I’m getting here.

// Everything you do influences the course of your life //

Snooze the alarm one more time? You have less time for breakfast. You rush. You’re stressed before you even DID anything.

Keep the tv off in the evening? Spend more time with your loved ones. Have quality time, creativity. Go to bed with positive vibes AND on time. Wake up rested. Don’t snooze.

// Learn to make good decisions //

Every decision even so small counts. Learn how to make them good. Every time.

Learn to setup your environment to facilitate good decisions.

Make it easy to make good decisions.
Make it hard to make bad decisions.

For example, setup your meditation space the night before.
Log out of netflix.
Switch your phone off at night. Put the charger far away from the bedroom.

Everything counts. Everything you do is a vote for or against the person you want to be.
Vote for the best version of yourself as much as possible.

Become aware of your habits. Nurture the good ones, make it hard for the bad ones.

// Tell me about your decisions //

What are your pivot points? Your small decisions that make your day a happy day?
What do you struggle with?
Tell me in the comments!

Much love
~Marius

Inspiration

How fear is the only thing holding you back

by Marius Helf

I learn a lot about my life and my approach to challenges when I do sports.

Last week I’ve been bouldering for the first in a while.
A few years ago, I got a knee injury from an unfortunate jump.

Since then, I have developed an unnatural fear of falling.

Even though falls in a boulder gym usually means a more or less controlled jump of no more than one meter onto padded ground.

I failed to climb some routes that I knew I could do. And I started to observe myself.

I would climb up. Then hang in the wall, just one meter above the ground, eyeing the next grip that looked just out of reach. Thinking I would fall if I reached for it.

Hanging there, watching, holding on to the grips and wasting my strength.

And then I’d fall off. No juice left in my arms. Thinking I couldn’t reach the next hold. Thinking I couldn’t climb that route.

I feared the fall, which resulted in exactly that. Falling.

Whether you think you can do it or whether you think you can’t, you are right.
Henry Ford (supposedly)

I thought I couldn’t do it. And I was right.

Until I realized what I was doing. I turned around, looked at the wall, and that next grip was not even far away!

So I told myself, Mr. Marius, that reach is absolutely doable. You can do it! And if you fall, it’s not even a meter. On padded ground! There is nothing to lose.

I changed my believe. The way I thought about myself.
I rationalized my fear. I knew I couldn’t hurt myself in the gym. I knew I could do it.

I stopped trying, and I started doing.

I climbed up to that reach again, and then I reached. And it held. And I finished.
And I finished many more routes, even some above my level.

Control your mind, control your fear, and you can do anything you want.

If you DO try, you may succeed.
Worst case, you fall into your safety net.

If you never try, you will NEVER succeed. You will stay on the ground, you won’t move forward.

I learn a lot about myself in the boulder gym.

And how to approach certain things in life.

It once again reminded me how important it is to try. Not even to try, but to DO it.

The importance of the environment

An average person in a good environment is more successful than a brilliant person in a bad environment
Taylor Welch

Overcome your fears.

Setup your environment.

When climbing, take a padded crash pad. Use a rope and take a buddy who will catch you.

In life, set your environment up for success. Build a good support network. Draw from it, and give back. Setup your crash pad.
And then, there is nothing to lose.

You only lose if you don’t try.

Much love
~Marius

Wim Hof Method

What to do against cold feet

by Marius Helf

Whether you practice the Wim Hof Method or not, you might struggle with cold hands and feet. If that’s the case, read on. I’ll show you how to improve that.

I (still) get cold feet

Many practitioners of the method, fresh and seasoned alike, struggle with cold hands or feet.
Many non-practitioners, too. Actually many practitioners started to improve that hand/foot situation.

Your feet could be cold after cold exposure, or just throughout the day.
This is not unbeknownst to myself. When I was half-way through my instructor class I was still struggling with cold extremities after every ice bath.

As an avid practitioner of the method I did what I thought would cure it: do more cold showers, do more cold dips in icy water outside. At one point the extremities must get used to the cold, right?

But nothing changed.
Sometimesone of my toes would stay white for hours, even though the rest of my body was perfectly warm.

So I took some courage and asked Douwe. At the time, Douwe taught the instructor master class. And I’m glad I did. Because what he said was a bit surprising for me.

Ice baths don’t help against cold feet

Well, they do a little bit, but ice bath’s are not quite the best tool to free yourself from what feels like icicles at the end of your arms and legs.

When you step into an ice bath, your whole body goes into survival mode. Homeostasis, trying to keep the body core temperature at 37 degrees. Your body does all it can to keep the core with all your vital organs warm. Your heart, your lungs, your kidneys, your liver.
One of its most effective tricks to keep your organs warm is to keep most of the blood in the core.

Which means that it pulls all the veins in your arms and legs tight. They are supposed to get cold in the cold. I mean, in terms of survival, what does it matter if you loose a toe or a finger? (please don’t stay in the cold long enough to put it to a test)

So in a full-body immersion, you teach your blood vessels in the extremities to constrict and get cold. Your body is too busy surviving to care about your extremities.

And even when you warm up, the hands and feet come last.

So while ice baths do train your whole body, including the extremities, it’s a lot if your main trouble zones are hands and feet.

What does help against cold feet

Let’s approach this from another angle. When you body is warm, but your feet are cold, a well functioning body will send nice, warm blood to the feet if it is safe. So in your winter boots or when you come home into the warmth there is no physical reason for cold feet.

For various reasons, for many of us that’s not how it works. Yet.
Even when you’ve warmed up after an ice bath, your feet and hands may stay cold.
Even when you’re snuggled up with a hot-water bottle under blanket, your feet are cold.

So for some reason, your body does not know how to open up you hands and feet.

The training plan for cold hands and feet

You can use cold to counter cold feet.

We want to train the blood vessels in our extremities to constrict when it’s cold, but also to open up again when it’s safe to do so.
Basically train our body’s natural response to temperature changes.

And temperature changes is what you can use for the training.

You need:

a bucket with ice water
a bucket with luke warm water

It’s important that the second bucket is just luke warm. Body temperature. Not hot.

And our training process looks like this:

put your hands (or feet) into the ice water. A minute or two is a good starting point.
move them into the bucket with warm water until they feel “warm” again.
Repeat.

I’d suggest to put all your focus into this exercise and use your will power to warm up your hands in step 2, and induce vasoconstriction in step 1.

Use your breath in step 1 to relax your body. Long exhales through the mouth, and try to relax your shoulders, arms and back.

You can repeat for as long as you can keep your focus.

If you do this a few times per week you will quickly experience improvements.

And never get cold feet again.

Much love
~Marius

Inspiration

We are sunlight

by Marius Helf

We eat, we breathe.

And what is it that we eat? Sunlight, quite literally.
And what is it that we breathe? Sunlight, quite literally.

Sunlight is the energy that makes plants grow.
Sunlight is the energy that allows plants to perform photosynthesis.
Photosynthesis transforms carbon dioxide to oxygen and carbon based structures.

The carbs that we eat.
The oxygen that we breathe.

Pure sunlight.

We are sunlight.

We are stars.

Much love
~Marius

PS: I have written about this before in much greater detail. Take 10 minutes and read it. It’s stunning, the cycle of life: what happens when we breathe.

Science

Of adrenaline and and the immune system

by Marius Helf

It’s this time of the year again… winter has officially started. It’s cold, it’s wet, it’s nippy, it’s time for flu and common cold. The days are short, and if you work in an office you may leave home before the sun is up and come back when the sun is down.

And maybe you feel some effects… a little less energy, a little head cold, a little low mood. I certainly feel it. I even got a proper flu this week for the first time in years.

So what can we do if we want to feel better, prevent getting sick or make for a quick recovery?

It’s simple: we need a strong immune system.

Our immune system’s base are the white blood cells.

Those little buggers love ADRENALINE. When the body is full of adrenaline, they come out, flood the blood stream and eat everything and everyone who does not belong there. Including evil bacteria and viruses.

Second, we need to reduce inflammation. And guess what… INFLAMMATION HATES ADRENALINE. Actually, adrenaline activates the so called Cori cycle, which increases our metabolism, gives our cells more energy and releases lactate into our blood stream. Which indicates to the body to produce anti-inflammatory messenger proteins such as IL-10.

Long story short, WE NEED ADRENALINE.

We could…

go bungee jumping, or
try crossing a highway at rush our, or
do breathwork.

Yeah that’s right. Wim Hof Breathwork produces up to 6 times more adrenaline than a bungee jump. Tells the body to produce more white blood cells, the body’s very own soldiers for fighting illness. And reduces inflammation.

So, go ahead and BREATHE, MOTHERF*CKER, as some people say. Whether you’re healthy right now, or whether you’re already fighting a cold. It’ll do you good.

Much love!

PS: it also produces cannabis, opioids and maybe even DMT right in your brain. Have a nice trip! 🙂

PPS: this is about short, intense bursts of adrenaline. Like breathworks, ice baths, sports. Don’t crank into Jason Statham. Reduce chronic stress. Chronic stress brings a lot of negative ramifications.

Much love. Breathe. Enjoy, like and share.

Inspiration

Habit beats Motivation

by Marius Helf

Have you ever been motivated to learn something new? To do more sports? Learn a language? Play an instrument?

But a year later, nothing has changed? Maybe you have had some progress for two weeks, but then you stopped? Or not even that?

Of course you have been super motivated. Maybe you have been on a vacation, and you want to talk more to the people. That’s brilliant motivation to learn the language! You ARE really motivated. Maybe you have bought a book. Maybe you learned how to say your name and order a beer. But a week later, a month later, even a year later that’s still it — you haven’t made any progress beyond “Hello, I’m Marius, I want a beer please.”

Maybe you made a resolution to learn the guitar. You want to be able to play Christmas songs for your family. Or be able to play Wonderwall at the camp fire. Last year you were super motivated. You bought a guitar, and an online course. You studied super hard for 2 weeks and learned to play Smelly Cat. And 12 months later you can play… Smelly Cat. That’s it.

Maybe one weekend some friends dragged you along to finally play soccer again. It felt great to be moving again. You had some great little successes during that workout.
It felt good knowing that you are finally doing something about those little extra pounds around your waist.
You are super motivated. Next week you’ll crush it!
And yet, Monday comes and goes, Friday comes, the next weekend, and you have done… nothing. Even though you’re soo motivated!

Does that feel familiar?

What is missing to turn motivation into action and change?

I’ve written about it before: we need to be turtles, not rabbits. We need to implement our process of change consistently, make it part of our life. But how?

What we need are: HABITS!

Habits beat motivation

Let’s look at it from the other side. What are things that want to do less? That you are not motivated to do, but yet do it regularly, even too much?

Do you sometimes eat too much? Too many sweets? Too many “sins” on the plate? I am certainly guilty of that.
But am I motivated to eat unhealthy? Do I say “OH MY GOD, TODAY I WANT TO EAT SOO MUCH SHIT!”. Nope. I don’t do that.

What else are we brilliant at? Scrolling too much on Social Media? Binge-watching Netflix or youtube? Mostly everyone these days does that every once in a while. Are you motivated to do it? Like thinking “WOW, I REALLY WANT TO READ ALL OF FACEBOOK TODAY!”. Do you do that? Right, I didn’t think so.

Or the most trivial thing… what everybody does consistently is brushing their teeth twice a day. And I bet no one is MOTIVATED to do that. No one thinks “I AM SO EXCITED TO BRUSH MY TEETH TONIGHT. AND TOMORROW. AND THE DAY AFTER!”

So what is it that makes us do all those things, if not motivation?

It’s… HABITS.

Habits are what keep us going. Habits drive much of our behavior. The good ones, and the bad ones. You are simply used to brushing your teeth. Scrolling facebook. Watching Netflix in the evening. You can do the same with the good stuff:

If you want to improve, you need to implement habits.
If you want to grow, you need to implement habits.
If you want to learn the guitar, you need to implement the practice as a habit.
If you want to learn a language, you need to implement the study as a habit.

Just like you brush your teeth at a certain point in your daily routine, no matter what, you need to implement the actions that bring you forward as habits into your routine.

You can even use existing habits as an anchor for your new habits

For example, everytime you brush your teeth, you play the guitar for 5 minutes. No matter how you feel, whether you feel motivated in that moment or not, you just pick up that guitar and play.
Or do 5 push ups.
Or learn 5 new words.

5 minutes is not a lot, but you build up the routine. And you make steps. YOU ARE A TURTLE!
2x 5 minutes a day makes 70 minutes a week.
5 hours a month.
60 hours a year.

And while 60 hours won’t make you a Jimi Hendrix, they might be enough to play Feliz Navidad under the Christmas tree next year. Or not feeling exhausted at the top of the stairs. Or do more than just ordering a beer during your next vacation.

Much love!
Marius

Inspiration

Always think positive?

by Marius Helf

How to think about the negative stuff with 5 fingers

Do you like to think positive?
Or would you like to think more positive?

This is what we hear around us a lot. This is what is taught by all modern gurus.

Positive thinking. A positive mindset. Learn from your mistakes and turn them into a positive experience.

This is what we hear a lot lately. And generally speaking, positive thinking is nice. It gives us a nice, cozy, comfortable feeling.
Our problems, our bad experiences crumble with all our positive energy.

Do they?

Well, some negative thoughts, some negative experiences are just that.. minor annoyances, that indeed we can think away, turn positive.

But other things are very real. Illness. Loss. Deep backlashes that life throws at us.

Sure, we can learn something from almost everything. But shouldn’t we be entitles to feel negative emotions every once in a while?

Joy and happiness are just 2 of many emotions that we are capable off. What about anger? Sorrow? Grief? Jealousy?
All valid emotions. And all have a place. They are less comfortable than joy. But they are there for a reason. Very personal reasons maybe, or maybe things that life throws at us, maybe things that we can control, or things that we can’t.

But if we do not allow ourselves to feel all those “negative” emotions, how can we fix the root cause? Or at least change our perspective on them?

That’s the difference between positive thinking and a positive mindset.
Positive thinkers do not want to see the bad. Which means they have no way to fix it.

A positive mindset tries to approach life with a generally positive attitude, but it names the problems by the name and grabs them by the balls to fix them. Without being pulled down by too many negative thoughts.

Here’s one exercise to see positivity while being open for change and progress.
All you need is your hand.

The 5-finger reflexion method

Count through your fingers and think about your day:

the thumb: SUCCESS
What went well today? What are my small, and big, successes?
the index finger: LEARNING
What did I learn today? Which new experiences did I have?
the middle finger: F*CK UPS
what did outright suck today and go really, REALLY wrong?
the ring finger: CONNECTION
What were my positive interactions today? What I get or provide positive feedback or recognition for?
the pinky: SHORTCOMINGS
What did I MISS today? What was lacking? What do I want to improve tomorrow?

This way, you can get a realistic and balanced view of your day. And with that, you can progress. And slowly and steadily improve little things, make your life more positive. While still allowing yourself to think of fuck-ups as what they are, still allow yourself to miss things and dislike things. And then act to change what you can change.

Go ahead and try it out right now! It only takes a few minutes, and I’m curious what you come up with 🙂

Imagine you had a 6th finger? What would you add? Let me know 👇, like and share if this was helpful.

Much love!
~Marius